Breakup Advice: What Exactly Is Closure?
You can't go forward until there is closure of an old relationship is the common belief. So is closure a must? My best explanation is, I think it is unique to every individual. Some people never really achieve what is viewed as closure and can still go on to have successful relationships.
What is closure anyway? Is it that ah-ha moment when you can let go of the past and have forgiveness? And is it absolutely necessary to be able to date again? Lets see:
The Difference Between Dating & Relationships
There is no emotional commitment when it comes to dating. There are feelings about the actual date but there is no commitment. Dating is basically a practice run.
Now when you compare dating to a relationship it's like comparing little league baseball to major league baseball. There is a whole lot more to a relationship especially when you have 100% involved your love, your dreams and your future plans.
You invest so much in a relationship, and the closure process comes in the form of getting back the control of your love, your dreams and your future visions. Unless we have back command of these pieces we will find it very difficult to start the process of a happy future with someone new.
This Is The Frustrating Part
Say you find someone else, and they look just the way you like, and they have the sense of humor you like, heck they even have great manners and smell good. The thing that sucks is if you are not in control of your feelings inside from your past relationship the new one doesn't stand a chance.
I know this may not be what some folks in that place in their lives want to hear but the thing to do is to put things off until you are able to get to that place with your ex that you can move on without them in your life. Until then forget about any new relationships.
If you are not yet ready for a relationship does that mean you shouldn't date? No, studies have shown that dating can speed up the act of getting your heart, your hopes and your dreams back.
Getting Back What Is Yours
Here's what I mean: Dating closure isn't a must but relationship closure is, if you are looking to build a successful relationship in the future. It is well worth the time and energy to get your emotional ducks in a row. Because it's not fair to you or the other person, know matter what they smell like.
Is it scary to take back your emotions? Yes. Is it worth the hard work? Yes, as long as you are looking at the big picture. The one where your happiness is involved.
There are times when it's not the right answer to seek closure and move on. If you're still in love with your ex you don't have to move on until you're ready to. You can get your ex back I can show you how. The Make Up Plan
