How to Know If Your Girlfriend Has Left You Behind For Good
"My "Girlfriend Dumped Me" has to be one of the top ranked worst things for a guy to say. If that is the point where you find yourself at right now. Devote yourself to this. Due to the fact that it is not definitely done with yet.
There are many causes why your sweetheart may have left you.
Most of the time these are not the purposes she is giving you for separating from you. Investigations indicate that a lot of women don't really recognize why the liaison has finalized. And usually, the situation is salvageable. Provided you don't cause more 'relationship damage' when she puts an end to what you had.
Sadly, it has to be said, most men wreck the relationship beyond repair when their lover breaks up with them. But that is a subject for another article…
So, how do you know if the break up is permanent or not?
You don't need to investigate why the relationship malfunctioned. You need to scan the 'status of the relationship' itself.
Let me give you some quick pointers on how to do this. This takes some envisioning on your part, to look beyond the small details and what she conveys. The reward will be your having complete clarity of the status of your relationship. No matter what she is saying to you, or how it seems, you will know what the reality of the situation is.
We will examine the relationship from three angles: drawing power, dependence and deference.
If you have lost either one of these irrecoverably, then you will be unable to bounce back from the split in any sustainable manner. You may be able to temporarily recover, but this is only putting off the eventual end. Ok, let's talk a little more about each of these.
Fascination: Is your ex-girlfriend still fascinated with you?
Signs of attraction include any of the following:
- Flirting with you
- Looking happy to see you when she does
- Accidentally bumping into you or turning up to places where you are
- Keeping track of and posting on your facebook
- Did she leave you for another guy?
- Did she fleece you?
Hint: For the last two on the list you have an 'attraction' problem.
Reliance: Does your former girlfriend still lean on you?
Did any of the following happen:
- She discovered you were cheating on her (and lying about it)
- You told others some private information about her that was intimate and she found out
- She was insecure about something important to her and you ridiculed her or were condescending about it
- She needed your support and you were too busy or just completely disacknowledged it
- In an argument you said things that couldn't be taken back (e.g. calling her names, or judging her negatively)
Hint: All of the situations above are very damaging to the trust in your relationship.
Does she still do any of the following:
- Confide in you about intimate and personal things
- Talk to you about the relationship between you openly
- Talk about her feelings openly with you
Hint: If she still does these then she still trusts you on some level.
Reverence: Does your ex-sweetheart revere you?
Have you noticed any of the following:
- She makes fun of or ridicules you in front of other people
- She dismisses things you say
- She asks for your advice about things
- She brags about you or talks up the things you have done to other people
- She talks about you in a condescending way to others
To make it easy for yourself give each of the above factors (attraction, trust and respect) a rating out of 10. Take seduction for instance. If she is still absolutely smitten with you, then you can give it a 10. If she is completely turned off by you then you know what to do. Provide it with the big zip.
If your dispassionate ratings are 7 or more for each of these, then you have a chance. More on target, you have an opening. You can take the relationship where you left off and rebuild it into something that will be long lasting. You need to knock it off, and ease back into the hookup. Oftentimes moderately. And you need to let things simmer down, especially the despondency before you take it back in that direction.
I wish for you to find yourself in the above situation. But please be painfully forthright with yourself. You will only harm yourself if you bamboozle yourself about the situation and don't face the truth.
If any of your objective ratings clocks in at below 7 then your relationship has been dealt some blows, which is more likely irreversible. The most stellar advice I can give you, is to start dealing with the end of the relationship now.
It is important to start to get over a break upas soon as you understand that your relationship is not recoverable.
